Studying Abroad will almost certainly be a defining period in your son or daughter’s educational experience, a psychological journey that will transform him or her into a global thinker with international perspectives and put him or her a step ahead of the competition in the eyes of prospective employers. In spite of this, you and your son or daughter, may have a wide range of feelings about the upcoming experience. Your feelings may range from excitement at its potential to stress at the idea of being far apart.
By understanding each other’s feelings and supporting decisions before, during and after the period of overseas study, you can help maximize this opportunity. Here is some advice on what to expect.
Encourage But Don’t Push
Before your student leaves, offer your full support. Let him or her know that you will be there throughout the experience if needed, including that you can be reached from overseas.
Time abroad often begins with a “honeymoon” period during which students are excited to finally be in the setting that they dreamed of. After facing realities such as unfamiliar language, commuting woes and the absence of usual support groups, culture shock can set in. At the same time, the student is away from on-campus medical, psychological and advisory services they may have come to rely on.
Expect to hear some tales of frustration, though your student will likely be experiencing many wonderful things as well, even if you are not the first to hear about them. In most cases he or she won’t expect you to solve problems, as much as you may want to, and is just looking for an understanding ear.
If studying abroad was your idea to begin with, be sure not to push too hard. Every year, program directors hear complaints from students who didn’t want to come in the first place, and those students experience more difficulty than others adjusting to the new environment. In fact, some never do.
Maintain a Level of Distance
It is by overcoming any difficulties that your son or daughter will quickly rise to a new level of independence, so avoid the temptation to become too involved. Ultimately, this is his or her learning experience.
Also it’s important to remember that study abroad students are not on vacation. If you want to visit, it’s best to do so when the program is finished so you can travel together without interrupting the student’s educational experience. Also, it is not wise to try to obtain permission for your student to return home early; the end of the semester is the most important part of his or her experience.
Prepare for the Transformation
After living abroad for as long as study abroad students do, they can’t help but be changed by the experience. This can take many forms, from new ways of dressing to cravings for different kinds of food or new political perspectives. Don’t worry too much: negative feelings usually last for a very short time, while a realistic view of America and its place in the world remains with most students for life.
Be prepared for him or her to experience some degree of reverse culture shock and need some time to fully readjust to living at home again. In some cases, he or she may even experience a period of depression or longing to return abroad. Once again, your support, interest and understanding will help your son or daughter during this life-altering experience. Observing and discussing changes like these is an excellent way to share in your son or daughter’s international experience, and you will probably want to hear more than most other people, which will be satisfying to your son or daughter. Most study abroad participants report years later that the time they spent overseas was the best part of their college years and that it changed them for life.